You're right

If you think this post is talking about you, you're right.
Confucius have this saying ," ren zhi chu, xing ben shang" which rougly meaning all human initially, or internally, are kind or should i say good. This saying is still valid today, but in another context.
In the past where goodness and evil are clear cut, its in everyone's intention to do what is good or to phrase it anothor way, what is right. But in the world now, everything is in shades or degree of goodness. So it seems that goodness has become a point of view, where something could be good or bad, either or neither or a little bit of both.
So in my humble observation of this morden world which i have not and wish not to see enough of yet. I conclude that human initially, or internally, choose to do the right thing.
Is the right thing good? it depends on the situation and the person. No one i guess will choose to do the things they thought of as wrong. Everyone knows that they are doing the right thing, its just a matter of weather the crowd agrees if its the right thing, thus deciding that its the good thing. Make sense, no?
Thus the term, self-righteous. Which is explain as "Piously sure of one's own righteousness; moralistic." Who am i to judge that the whole world is self-righteous? Because I am self-righteous too, therefore I "believe" that I'm right.
How does everyone cover up the fact that they are self-righteous? Simple, cause the basic opinion of goodness is still common. The few people that have an alternate view ends up as rebel, criminals, phycos or social rejects. Lets say this guy didn't get enough love from his parents as a kid. when he grew up he love little kids, literally giving then the love he didn't get. What do you get? Yep, A self-righteous child molester.
The thing with self-righteous people, esp those overboard cases is that they have lots of reasons to back up their action. They always see a need to speak up for or explain for their actions which in my opinion spells out "no confidence of self plus full of excuses". I on the other hand don't give resons for my actions which in other's opinion says that I'm "aloof, unreasonable". So who is right? Everyone is.
Are self-righteous people selfish? No. There are people that take upon himself that he must look out for his friends, family and colleagues. These group have a higher level known as "group to self"-righteous as in he projects his believes of the group or what the group should be like as an "group's expectation" Thus sees it as his responsiblity to mantain the intergrity to uphold the "group's expectation" which is actually his own. An example will be a homo phobic pastor believes that his church hates gays. And sees it as he responsiblity to condamn gays in the name of his church. If its a soap opera, he will find out that his own son is gay in the last episode.
So, If you think this post is talking about you, you're right. You always are.

(monotone , being a deviant, thinks that he's wrong most of the time. He thinks his right about that)

Star wars FAQ

~ Warning! there are no possible spoilers in this faq due to the fact that I have poor memory, I was half awake while watching it at 02 30 and I'm also not a fan ~

What race is Yoda?
Yoda is a malay. This can be concluded from the way he speak. Notice his sentence structure is reverse? Just like the malay language. His great networkin skills, like most Malays, is also noted when he was "pre informed" about "order 66".

Why is the battle held at Mustafa?
It's opened 24 hours.

What are C3PO and R2D2 originally designed for?
Talking Dildos. C3PO is the asian model, sleek shy and sensitive. While R2D2 is the western design, thick tough and stupid.

What's the noise? Is Darth Vadar having Asthma?
Nope. His helmet is specially designed by SAF. Project name " Your helmet got air - con ah?"

What does the buttons in front of Darth Vadar's armor do?
Air con controller.

What makes Anikin Skywalk the chosen one?
Its all in the name. Like Phua Chaikin Landrunner.

How to differential the Jedis from the good and evil?
Those from the dark side wear hoods. They are gangsta.

How to save Anikin from the dark side?
Get him to hang out wif Yoda. They can relex one corner and chill.

Which hand does a Jedi use to hold his light saber and which one to "chu" the force?
This can be judge from the way he eats. See which hand use the knife (light saber) and which hand holds the fork (force)

What if the Jedi is using a chopsticks?
Then he is a fake. Note that there are no chinese Jedi.

What race is chubaka?
Low tech, overpopulated planet, giblish language and all the inhabitants looks the same. Isn't it obvious?


Is there any local sponsers for Star wars?
Yes. PUB is the official sponser for palpathine's electric force. Ren chi old folks home sponsered for the battle scene of Yoda and palpathine.

My friend's 7, cannot 7

I never knew how to behave in front of my friend's girlfriends. Its weird basically. If you don't talk to them, you are being unfriendly. If you talk to themtoo much, it seems like you are trying to jio them, which in chinese history, you and her will end up drowning in pig basket. Conclusion? I try to be friendly but not so friendly.
Last week, I went out with a group of friends and this guy brought his girlfriend along. So as usual, I was making my small talks. To be not so friendly, I talk to the group instead of to her, to add in a dash of friendliness I try to make eye contact with her as I glance pass the whole group.
Bad move. Did I mention that we are eating?
So there she was, bending over to eat her noodles and I glance over trying to make eye contact. At that moment, time stood still. In that split second, she looks up and saw me lookin at her and she proceed to look down at her "down blouse". Her right hand drop her chopstick and immediatly hold on to her t shirt. Within that time span before her chopstick reach the table, a tear flow from my cheeks... I'm innocent.. I'm just trying to be friendly.
FYI when guys look at down blouse or up skirt, we never glance. We Always stare.
So should I just act as an unfriendly bastard and ignore the gal friends? Please advise.

You have been Warned (and i fucking mean it)

Recently , I can't seem to talk to none industry people any more. These people, not being in the cg industry thus not knowing what is it like, loves to challenge my point of view every single fucking day.
Ok , I work fucking 15 hours everyday, I have to bao ga liao in my job, my pay is shit, i drink a lot , I have no life and i fucking admit it ok? It's my fucking life and I choose it.
So stop trying to remind me this every single fucking time! I have enough of all your shit.
Do you fuckers know how hard it is to work so much and so long everyday? And after that I still have to answer for all the "why u work so hard" questions? Fuck you! Why in the world do I fucking need to explain for being hardworking? What the fuck has the fucking world comes to?

Trust me, the next time I heard :
You work so hard for what?
You should change your Job.
You should ask for more pay.
You should get OT pay.
You must love your job so much that you for so long for so little pay.
Why you so stupid, don't do so much lar.
.... or anything along that line. I'll greatly consider losing you as a friend then losing my sanity.

Its hard enough for me to hang on to what I love to do. Dun fucking try to shake my beliefs. I mean it.

(monotone will appriciate the fact that people keep their comments to themselves. Its his dream to make a movie as an animator, dun make his fuck up life worse. Thank you)

Hairvolution

People who know me long enough knows that I have this problem with my hair. It seems that I can never find a style that’s suit me. See the dame thing is that whatever style I like, my friends think that I looks crappy. You can’t please everyone can you?
A round face shape with curly hair is hard to style. Add in a pair of specs and it gets worse. I tried to get creative with it but my mother’s kind comments says it all

“ What kinda of hair is that? Dun go out sia suay yourself”
“What age already? Hair still comb until like that”
“You look like the ghost I saw on TV jus now”

Enough said.

The Primary school Era
Decent side parting on the left.

The Secondary School year
Was the beginning of ah bengs and pointed combs. I shifted to the then popular center parting. Comb flat down. Really Flat down.

The Poly Days
Couldn’t let go of my center parting, I continued with it. The hair gets curlier and without gel, the center forms a nice M. It was named by my friends the “Mac Donald hair”

Army times
Botak.
And the infamous 4-3-2-1 sispec hair.
It gets real short till it can’t curl anymore
Seems that everyone is going with the Armani hair look. So I followed.

Wax generation
And then came a revolution in the hair styling industry. Gatsby wax
I first started with the spiky look. It goes well…. Until I ORD.
After I ORD, it gets too long till it can’t spike anymore. The spike sort of falls down and becomes the “Spider” look. As soooosh describes “looks like loots of spiders doing flutter kicks”
Since its going down, I decided to let it all go down and got what my friends called “ the it- just- rained looks” Yeah it sucks.
Now I’m returning to the side parting with curls looks. So far so good I hope.

The Future
Still letting it grow longer and will dye it gray in the near future. Let's just wish that it wouldn’t look crappy.

I.R.C Its Really Crap

There are shitty days where you are stuck at home with nothing to do. You get online and everyone is not there to chat with you. You start to suspect that they all went out together and continently forgot you. What are you left with? IRC.

To me, IRC is like Mos Burger. You haven’t eaten it in a long time and you keep forgetting why you don’t. Till one desperate day you decided to eat it again then you remembered. The food sucks and it expensive. Yeah, IRC sucks.

I get on IRC mainly to chat. Not to make friends or whatever. Sometimes I do get weird messages.There’s this guy name “fighter” that has on 2 occasions “invited” me to fight him. It goes something like:

“Do you fight?”

“No, but I like martial arts”

“What style you fight?”

“I don’t fight. But I do somersaults”

“I do thai boxing. Wanna fight?”

“No, I dun fight.”

I’ll recall another incident where I gave my phone number to a girl on IRC and she calls me straight. She a self-proclaimed “gui kia” that used to chiong Sparks and Club 3. The one sided conversation gets worse when she starts to mention that she like techno. It deteriorates when she decide to sing the famous (infamous in her version) “Moonlight Shadow” to me. It comes complete with her human beat box and melody. I erased her number there and then.

So today to research for this entry, I steps into the gates of IRC once again. Its like arklam asylum here.

Any Girls wants to test your sibling? pls msg me {There are some requirements} Thanks!

<****et> hi any cute plump girl wanna chat with 20.m here msg me thanks alot......(cute plump gals seems to be in demand in IRC, I never understand why.)

any gals haf sch uniform, shorts clothes to let go msg me

any gals wanna see me nude in cam?

Anyone here M with friend b4?(M stands for…. Migrate?)

Any guys aged 23-28 looking for a serious stead?(This gio gal has been here seems forever. The age requirement increases every year. Lets hope she finds she “serious stead” soon)

Any Ladies would like to date(clean date) a guy in his 20s, with stable career above 50K yearly income, my hobbies include running, swimming, soccer, guitar, piano, movies, pool, bridge, music, reading, travelling, golf, photography, cycling, ktv, chinese chess, international chess, motorsports, fastbikes and martial arts, do msg me for details now! BMI =21. IPPT=Gold. Looking for long term relationship if things work out.(I think this is the guy from my “perfect couple” entry)

The only conversation I had tonight is this

hello Monotone

hi... intro?

i'm a girl. are you a boy?

yep wats ur age?

i see. i would like to know more about you :-)

wat do u wanna know?

come and meet me in this chatroom: http://sexpartner.4u.hu/

er ok... see u there…

Please invite me to go out on weekends. I don’t wanna get stuck home chatting to this perverts.

Solitude

Q: What's worse than going home and caught ur best friend and ur galfriend in bed?
A: Going home and found that you have no best friend and no gal friend at all.

Its sucks to be alone......

(monotone is not lonely.... just isolated...)

Never Meant to Let you Down

In a late afternoon in 1990, little monotone is on his way home from school. He's lost his bus pass earlier at recess today, so reluctantly he walked home. Being the smart ass he is, he tried to take a short cut in the back alley. The sky got darker as he proceed. He lost his way, but found something else....

My bus went passed Towner area this evening, and I decided to drop down. I took a slow walk to my old primary school. Its weird isn't it? When you go back to your childhood places, its seems that the places is exactly the same as you left it. Time casted and fixed. It stared at the old walls, reminiscing. Fresh coats of paints, renovations and a change of names for this school doesn't erase my memories. Enjoying the cool breeze, I walk home from there, bashing through the back alleys.
Dejay vu. Been here before... different perspective... Suddenly out of nowhere, a kid ran into me. I look at his uniform, Balestier Primary? I thought they closed the school long ago. I examine his face... Oh fuck! It's me from the past. He seems to recognize that too.

"What are you doing here, shouldn't you be at home at this time?"
"I lost my bus pass. Since you are my future, do you remember where I place it?"
"It's so long ago, I don't even remember that I lost my bus pass. Here's some coins, take the bus home"
"I can't use that. Its money from the future."
"Aiyah fuck you la, the money have not change. Just take it."
"So, tell me about the future. Flying cars and aliens and stuff?"
"Wah lao, I thought I used to be smart. Cut that crap. If there's flying cars, I wouldn't be walking home now."
"Then did I end up with the pretty girl from class 3-2?"
"Who the hell is that?"
"you know, the only cute one with the pigtails?"
"Like I say, its so long ago, I don't even remember who is that"
"So what does my future girlfriend looks like?
"Don't have any now."
"Hmmm... have may you have in total?"
"...About...one ?"
"One? How fuck up can you get?"
"Hey, going to an all boys secondary school is a mistake ok?"
"How about after that?"
"Well, I dunno... after that it goes downhill all the way I guess"
"wah lao.... so are you earning big bucks now?"
"Not really."
"Why not?"
"Times are hard... its not that easy to earn money you know? I've tried my best."
"Your best is not good enough! Look my results have always been good. I shouldn't have end up as a loser like you!"
"Hey. Its not that easy growing up. The world is not as simple as you think."
"What's so difficult? You work hard, you earn more."
"The society have change. Its not like that anymore."
"Still... I'm better then the rest... I should achieve more"
"See... that’s what I fucking hate about you. You always think so highly of yourself. That will cause your fall in the future.... and that's me"
"Don't blame me for your failures! You fucking loser. You are nothing"
"I.... I'm sorry that you felt this way about me. I guess I really disappoint you"
"Of course you did!"
"If you think you can do better... go ahead and try. Just want you to know that I have done my best. Sorry I didn't turn out what you expected me to be."
"I will definitely be better than this... you'll see"

With that the kid ran away, leaving me standing there. I continue to walk home. I don't know how or what to feel. When I apologise to the kid, I was actually saying sorry to my present self. Why didn't I end up as what I wanted to be? how will I end up in the future? I felt a part of me has died.

That night, little monotone went home and did his homework straight. He has to work hard, to fight for the future.

Changing Lanes

Just finish watching the movie Changing Lane staring Ben Affleck and Samuel L Jackson. Well the movie isn't that bad but it reminds me of something. 3 years ago, at a cinema which the show is screening, I caught a glismp of the poster for this show and I have a pre-conceived idea about the movie. Looking back, its totally different from what I'm watching today.

What the show is really about:
The two guys got caught in a traffic accident and Samuel accidentally took an important file that belongs to Ben. So Ben trys to threaten Samuel to give him back his stuff and Samuel, being black with all his issues, tell him not to fuck with him.
So the 2 guys fuck around with each other, trying to screw up each other's life. In the end, all problems are solve when they help one another. Tag line : One Wrong Turn Deserves Another

What I thought the show is about:
Ben got onto a cab and Samuel happens to be the driver (all blacks in holloywood movies driving are either drivers or thieves). He asked to be brought to some where far away and Samuel drove him down the highways.
Ben lite a cigarette, starts to get emotional and laments about his past. It seems that Ben is on his way to commit suicide cause he felt that he has done nothing right in his life. This scene gets really emotional and Samuel decides to confess something too (other then the fact that he's black and has lots of issues)
Samuel was actually back on the first day of cab driving today, after he quitted ten years ago. On a stormy night ten years ago, he drove a fugly bapok to the city. The bapok sudden told him to make a right turn. So he try to change lane. While turning his head over to check blind stop, the bapok rape him in the ass. Tramatized by the experience, he quit his night job and become a full time alcoholic.
Just then, Ben made a final request before he die. Since he never done a right thing in his life, he wanna make a right turn before he dies. But Samuel couldn't do it, his ass is still sore whenever he look to his right. He ask Ben if he can make 2 left turns instead and Ben retorts "2 lefts doesn't make a right"
The ending climaxs as Samuel finally took the courage to turn right. As he turn his head to check blind stop to change lane, Ben fuck him in the ass. Ends up that Ben's life is fucked up cause he never accept the fact that he's gay. He finally did the right thing while turning right. At that moment, Samuel accepts the fact that he was never meant to go straight (pun intended) and decides to live life to the gayest.
The show ends with the cab turn right and drove towards the sunset.... with them fucking each others ass inside. Tag line: 2 ass always make a right.

Hmm... seems like I should read the synopsis of movies next time.

Reset

I have a recurring dream that I committed suicide. In the dream, I'm crying like fuck about my miserable life, and at the end I'm happily dead, knowing that I can restart my life. I woke up wondering why I'm still alive.....

Q: Why do we like to sleep?
A: Its the closest to death we can ever get.

(monotone plans to blog about his fuck up life on this post but decided not to. He's not a fan of self pity)