Emptiness Happiness

People who know me knows that I can't smile. I can only laugh. I'm one of those fuckers that never smile in a photo shot. Why?

For most people , smile = happy : laugh = very happy
For me its , smile = genuinely happy : laugh = acting happy

At this point you might be thinking, don't you laugh a lot? Are you acting all this time?
My reply is yes and no.

I like to make people happy, seeing that makes me happy. Laughing is contagious. Therefore when I'm acting happy I make others very happy therefore I'm genuinely happy. Get it?

Facial expression is a by product of feelings. Being sad will make you cry but crying doesn't make you sad. That's why there are actors. Alcohol makes me laugh, its an experience I term Emptiness Happiness cause there's nothing to be happy about. Come to think about it, there is nothing to be really happy about in life.

Next time when you see me, try to catch if I'm really happy -___-