Stoned

You are walkin down the street when suddenly a person threw a rock at you. He told you it was accidental you forgive him and continue walking. Its just an accident right? You move on.
Further down, a brick hit you. You look around. No one. Shit happens right? You move on.
As you move on, you are struck by a stone, dropped from nowhere. Bad luck? You move on.
You carry on walking. A kid accidentally kicked a pebble which hit your feet as he walk pass you.
This time you can't take it anymore.
You grabbed him by the collar and lift him up . He tries to explain that he didn't mean it. But words have no effect on you anymore. You are filled with rage. And you hit him so hard that he wished he wasn't born.
Isn't life like that? You are filled with rage, wacked with unfairness, slammed by the world and yet its nobody's fault. Wanna blame someone? Blame the situation, blame the butterfly that flap its wings last week in London .... if it makes you feel better.

(Note: the first 2 paragraph was written late Augest 2004. I was talking about this same story a day ago to a couple of my friends and was quite surprised to find this story half completed here. Felt obligatedto finish it)

Frame of mind

Record my current frame of mind,
to be simple, quick concise,
say its empty is anything but true,
It's thoughts of nothing that makes it full.

Memories of past come flashing by,
Thinking of how fast time fly,
to live into present but appriciate the past,
having hope for the future is a must.

But all this will end in due time,
once the feeling's gone is a change of mind,
back to earth as they all say,
live back the same life as yesterday.

Dreamin... 

Reality

Was at taka today when i met a young couple. The Dad was around 26 wif a 3 yr old kid. The Mom is around 23 ; pregnent with a weak smile on her face.
When look at them I thought " Are they happy?"
Its scary when reality of starting a family is so true and near me. I cringe as I look at them. I was thinking, doesn't the couple have any dreams of their own? Any goals the guy wish to achieve when he was young? Any ambition the lady wanna follow since she was a kid?
Was it all destoryed now? Now that they are tied down by their commitment. Sure, they can pass down all their hopes to their next generation. But by that time the same thing would have happen.
Thats Life. Its a vicious cycle.

Age 20 and below you are full of dreams and hope for the future.
Age 25 and above you are fighting for survival
Age 20 to 25 you met your greatest nemesis : REALITY. Its the killer of all Dreams.

Its the society that is causing this. Any normal guy should have a 2.5 k job, a car , a girlfriend, a credit card .... normal is overated. SO we should acquire all this before we can follow over dream? Isn't it too late by then?

Or is a dream just a dream and we should leave it at that? Is it one of those things in life which we should never get so it will always push us on in life?

Will the cycle of life be broken? Will the truth in life be found out one day?

Transform

Once again I have come here... Here, at this place in my mind; within my heart; deep in my soul, to once again re-evaluate myself. To see things I have done, not done or should be re done. To see how much I have grown, developed and fallen.

Question : If a Caterpillar changed into a Butterfly, What Is It?
Is it a Butterfly Or is It a Caterpillar in another form, in which its essence is still the same and the flying form is just a facade?

If it really is a Butterfly, it shouldn't be thinking of this question.
If it is still a Caterpillar but in different form, then there are no real Butterflies in this world.

But is a Butterfly Perfect? Isn't it everything the Caterpillar wanted to be. It tries ways and means to discard its erroneous ways and improve itself just to reach this goal. But now that it is flying, is it perfect? No. The Caterpillar is still feeling the same.

True, it has enjoyed its first few weeks in flight, loving its beauty and glory but now when the good times have passed and bad times arrived, can its new form handle the situation?

Is the Caterpillar blaming the butterfly or himself?
Does the Caterpillar still refused to acknowledge the fact that the Butterfly is not perfect, thus pushing all the blame to itself?
Or has the Caterpillar not really changed into a butterfly yet?

So who AM I? I might just be a Flying Caterpillar

Where it all begain...

What is the fastest thing in the world?
Bullet train? Fighter jets? Lightning?
Nope..... Its a thought. Just try for once to guage how fast a thought is. Once your mind come up with a thought, its so fast that you can't even put it into words. Everything you think of will come at the same time, in one huge mess and after that you will need to think of how to phase it, to communicate to pass on the idea.
Jus what I'm doing here is trying to capture the fastest thing, my thoughts.
This is not a diary, you have no right to know my darkest secret.
This is not a documentation, you have no right to know my life.
This is not a auto biography, I'm not even famous.
What this is, it's a mental dump. Here I will throw all my thoughts, ideas, theories and feelings, wherever and whenever they come up. So read it if you want, ignore it if you think its trash. I don't care, cause its not meant for you anyway...